Ghostwatch (Lesley Manning, 1992)
Considering how there's practically sweet F.A. worth watching on the BBC these days (other than Mastermind, of course), this is a good opportunity to revist a nineties gem from "Auntie" on its 30th anniversary. Ghostwatch was a reality TV mockumentary featuring familiar TV presenters, cast as themselves. This included: famous chat show interviewer, Michael "Parky" Parkinson as the condescending and cynical studio host; Sarah Greene as the on the spot presenter at the haunted North London home (obviously inspired by the notorious Enfield Poltergeist); her actual hubby, Mike Smith, back at the studio as the phone line presenter, while Craig Charles, of Red Dwarf fame, dilly dallying about outside the spooky house talking to a gathering crowd.
The beauty of Ghostwatch was its gradual escalation from supernatural folly to full blown paranormal absurdity. The program was and still is absolutely hilarious. From the creepy house's basement nicknamed "The Gloryhole", to Ken and Joyce Shrivener from Telford, reporting their radio died and the microwave wouldn't stop pinging, or Sarah Greene finding a mysterious wet patch on the carpet - pure comedy. Pick of the bunch was a caller named Kevin Tripp being spooked while having a sandwich. Parky was not amused and dismissed him as a crank caller.
"I had this sandwich; cheese and pickle sandwich it was, and well, it frightened me to buggery it did. I was minding my own business and this dirty, great plate sitting on the arm of my chair just dived off." - Kevin Tripp, Ghostwatch, 1992.
Aside from the over acting from both the distressed mother and the para-psychologist expert, I found the rest of the performances fairly convincing. The two young girls terrorised by Pipes (I shit you
not), the resident ghost, were the best performers, in my opinion.
They really do help sell the premise of this mockumentary. There's an air of Alan Patridge awkwardness about the film, but they do an awful lot to convey their fear in a believable manner.
Ghostwatch left a much talked about legacy in its wake. Many viewers hadn't tuned in at the start to see the opening credits, which revealed it was all fake. The BBC were inundated with complaints by proto-Karens after it aired. Cosidering the show was upfront, it was hardly on the same level of spectacular trolling like Orson Welles' War of the Worlds radio play had been in the 1930s. Still, it's funny knowing so many people out there fell for this admittedly well conceived prank. To be a fly on the wall of some poor pill head's crib that Halloween night and watching them freak out. Off your face and having Parky's demonic voice coming out of the TV would have been f**king priceless to witness.
It's worth noting Ghostwatch predates the likes of Orell Peli's Paranormal Activity franchise. That entire series of films owes its entire existence to this show. I also wouldn't be at all surprised if The Blair Witch Project (1999) and The Conjuring 2 (2016) took notes from the BBC one-off; especially the latter.
Definitely considered Ghostwatch while compiling my G.O.A.T Brit Flicks, but I hadn't seen it since it originally aired and didn't feel comfortable including it as it wasn't fresh in my mind at the time. Kind of wish I did after revisiting it, since despite being much older and even more cynical now, Ghostwatch was a definite gem from back in the day, and it still holds up. Classic television, right here.
