Showing posts with label best films. Show all posts
Showing posts with label best films. Show all posts

Friday, August 21, 2026

Picks of 2006

A selection of films I enjoyed from the year when Pluto was demoted to a dwarf planet, Twitter was launched and Pauline Fowler shuffled off this mortal coil.

300 (Zack Snyder)
All the Boys Love Mandy Lane (Jonathan Levine) 
Apocalypto (Mel Gibson)
Black Book (Paul Verhoeven)
Children of Men (Alfonso Cuarón)
Cold Prey (Roar Uthaug)
The Departed (Martin Scorsese)
Exiled (Johnnie To)
The Foot Fist Way (Jody Hill)
The Hills Have Eyes (Alexandre Aja) 
Idiocracy (Mike Judge)
Rocky Balboa (Sylvester Stallone)
Pan's Labyrinth (Guillermo del Toro) 
The Prestige (Christopher Nolan)
Silent Hill (Christophe Gans)
Them (Xavier Palud & David Moreau)

In hindsight, 2006 was a vintage year for cinema. 

According to my Letterboxd, I also liked this lot: Bug (William Friedkin); Cocaine Cowboys (Billy Corben); The Fountain (Darren Aronofsky); and Jonestown; The Life and Death of Peoples Temple (Stanley Nelson). I haven't revisited them in ages, though, and I have no idea if they still hold up. 

Glaring blindspot - Littleman. 

Thursday, August 20, 2026

10 Favourite Films Featuring Brits Abroad

The concept for this post originated during a period of being stranded overseas earlier this year. The war kicking off in the Middle East, made flights home extra difficult. Since returning, I have been considering how to develop the idea of films that portray British folk abroad. Whether for holiday, work or permanent residence, I intend to list my favourites in cinema.

Issues arose when I deviated from the initial concept by including war movies or films with a war-adjacent theme. Additionally, films featuring the one British supporting character were excluded. I also encountered difficulties with the nationalities of actors and the characters they portrayed. This was particularly tricky with the film Wake in Fright (1971), where I was uncertain whether John Grant, the film's protagonist, was English or an Australian, despite his obvious accent. Largely due to Donald Pleasence being a Brit playing an Australian opposite him. Similarly, Tom from Who Could Kill a Child? is an English character, but Lewis Fiander, who portrays him, is an Australian. These inconsistencies were a significant headache, and I just wanted to get it done.

I was compelled to complete this task before the end of the summer holidays as posting after that timeframe would be considered late. Most British people return home from their holidays before September, so publishing this blog post now felt appropriate.

The Lady Vanishes (Alfred Hitchcock, 1938)

Set in the fictional European country of Bandrika, The Lady Vanishes is a film about a British tourist who notices the disappearance of an elderly passenger on her train. As she investigates the mystery, she is confronted by numerous instances of gaslighting from the other travellers. Fortunately, she is aided by a musician who believes in her story.

Margaret Lockwood and Michael Redgrave are remarkably compelling playing the leads. Their electric chemistry is a significant factor to what makes the film so appealing. However, the supporting characters, predominantly consisting of other British tourists, is what qualifies The Lady Vanishes for this criteria. Caldicott and Charters, serve as precursors to C-3PO and R2-D2 thanks to their comical remarks. Their obsession to arrive in Manchester on time for a test match, makes them the most enthusiastic cricket fans you’ll ever see on film.

Hitchcock’s classic signature style and elements are all there, even for such an early film from the legendary director.

Dracula Prince of Darkness (Terence Fisher, 1966)

A prime example of British entitlement overseas. The Kents, our naive English tourists, disregard all warnings to avoid the region of Karlsbad, Hammer’s fictionalised name for what is essentially Transylvania. We wouldn't have a movie if they did, otherwise.

After being abandoned in the forest by their coachman, the foursome are greeted by a driverless carriage that transports them to Castle Dracula. Despite their dire situation, they remain convinced they have been rescued. While there, they encounter the sinister Kolve, the creepy servant, who offers them hospitality from his deceased master. “You know, if only that coachman knew it, he did us a favour by abandoning us.” Charles Kent remarks. The saps even raise a toast to the Count. The equivalent of turkeys voting for Christmas.

This culminates in Alan Kent’s murder by Kolve. Hoisted over a sarcophagus containing Dracula’s remains, Alan is subsequently slashed in the throat and the iconic Kensington gore resurrects the Count, in a remarkably disturbing effects scene. That same night, Alan’s distressed wife (unknowingly a widow), Helen (the First Lady of Hammer, Barbara Shelley), becomes the Count’s vampire wench.

Too bad Helen succumbed to the undead, as she was the only one with any real intuition, and the least annoying Brit in the entire film. Almost a wasted effort for Andrew Keir's Father Sandor to come along and rescue the remaining Kents, as it’s doubtful the toffee-nosed couple even learnt anything from their ordeal.

The Italian Job (Peter Collinson, 1969) 

Following his release from prison, Charlie Croker is persuaded by the widow of his former partner to proceed with the heist he had masterminded in Turin, Italy. The crime would involve dozens of individuals, numerous vehicles and an engineered traffic jam. All of which during an England away match and in broad daylight. The situation becomes more complex and perilous when Charlie realises the potential of having to contend with the mafia as well as the police.

The appeal of this comedy crime caper lies in its encapsulation of 1960s British optimism during its period of pop cultural prominence. Hence, such an audacious and intricate heist executed by a diverse class of characters, including cheeky Cockneys and ‘chinless wonders’, reflects the broad spectrum of Britishness on film. This is spearheaded by Michael Caine’s Croker, among a cast of recognisable actors including Noël Coward, Robert Powell and Benny Hill.

The film’s most iconic scenes are undoubtedly the ones involving the red, white and blue Mini Coopers. Sadly, there's little time to mourn for their destruction, before the literal cliffhanger ending.

It's completely unsurprising that The Italian Job has become a TV favourite during bank holidays, festive events and national sporting occasions. An instant patriotic shot in the arm for all Brits; which is ironic, given it’s about a gang of British criminals going overseas to pillage.

And Soon the Darkness (Robert Fuest, 1970)

Jane and Cathy, two English nurses on a cycling holiday in France, temporarily separate after an argument over their travel plans. This decision proves ill-advised, as they soon realise the dangers of being completely alone in an unfamiliar country.

Robert Fuest’s paranoia-fuelled thriller emphasises the perils of being a stranger in a foreign land. This is particularly challenging for the pair of young women, who are constantly leered at by men and a language barrier that further adds to their insecurities. Hence, there is a deliberate uncertainty in the intentions of the few locals offering assistance. Paul, the suave-looking moped driver, who constantly watches them from afar, being a major example.

Pamela Franklin delivers an understated performance as sensible Janet in what is arguably final girl prototype material. Brian Clemens and Terry Nation’s screenplay is full of unexpected twists and turns, which always makes this a compelling viewing, especially when the film is largely set on a French country road. This is complimented by Fuest's direction managing the rare triumvirate of suspense, dread, and terror in broad daylight. The end result, is a superb Hitchcockian-style thriller.

Carry On Abroad (Peter Rogers, 1972)

Pub landlord Vic Flange’s plans to go on holiday to the Mediterranean island of Elsbells with voluptuous, local widow Sadie Tompkins have been rumbled by his wife, Cora. Despite her travelling apprehensions, Cora would prefer to accompany her husband, just to keep a watchful eye on him. Thus, she’s another Brit holidayer on the Wundatours Travels package holiday.

The rest of the holidaymaker ensemble are introduced while boarding the coach to the airport. They include: Stanley Blunt, a sexually deprived husband and his prudish and domineering other half Evelyn; alcoholic mummy’s boy Eustace Tuttle; brash Scotsman Bert Conway; girlfriends Lily and Marge, on the hunt for blokes; Nicholas and his possessive gay friend Robin; and a group of twelve monks, including Brother Bernard, who is struggling to adapt to his new life in the religious order. All managed by Wandatours Travels representative Stuart Farquhar and his attractive assistant Moira Plunkett.

It turns out the Elbells Hotel remains under construction when they arrive there. Despite this, Pepe the multi-role proprietor is insistent on accepting guests. Thus, our British holidaymakers experience a series of unfortunate events where they’re barely fed, bitten by mosquitoes, disturbed from their sleep by construction workers, and deprived of any personal privacy. Fortunately, a brawl outside a local brothel, a spiked punch bowl, and in the case of Mrs. Blunt, an adulterous couple of hours with, Georgio, the hotel barman, transform the holiday from Hell into a blast. There’s a vital lesson to be taught here, but I can’t think of it.

Talbot Rothwell’s comedy dialogue is exceptional in this film. The scene where the Flanges and Blunts share a dinner table is a prime example of his writing talent. Vic offers to pour wine for the prudish Evelyn.

Evelyn Blunt: Not for me, thank you!

Vic Flange: No? You don’t drink?

Evelyn Blunt: No, I tried it once and didn’t like it.

Vic Flange: Oh! Have a smoke?

Evelyn Blunt: I tried it once and didn’t like it.

Vic Flange: Strange.

Evelyn Blunt: Not at all. My daughter is just the same.

Vic Flange: Your only child, I presume.

Slide whistles and double entendres! This is a favourite of mine from the Carry On films. At this stage in the franchise, the cast and crew are so familiar with one another, that their chemistry feels completely natural. I also appreciate the construction of Helsbells Beach, which was created using a pile of sand and deckchairs in the parking lot of Pinewood Studios. Really remarkable how much can be achieved with a low budget.

The world isn't ready for Peter Rogers being considered one of the most prolific directors of all time.

Horror Express (Eugenio Martin, 1972)

Professor Sir Alexander Saxton, a palaeontologist, makes a groundbreaking discovery when he finds what he believes is the missing link in human evolution, preserved in the caves of Manchuria. He is determined to return to England with his find and boards the Trans-Siberian Express. There he is met by his rival Dr Wells, a mad monk and a series of horrifying deaths, before the cossacks join in.

When the frozen missing link is revealed to be an alien energy that  kills and possesses its victims, paranoia ensues. A detective remarks that either one of the pair of scientist scould also be the alien fiend. The insulted Dr. Wells responds with one of my favourite retorts: "Monster? We're British, you know."  

Based on John W. Campbell’s Who Goes There?, the source material for both The Thing from Another World (1951) and John Carpenter’s remake The Thing (1982), Horror Express is a also a cult classic, in its own right. Renowned for being a brilliant science fiction horror story, Eugenio Martin compliments it with a chilling atmosphere and genuinely terrifying scenes which haven't dated; notably the bleeding blank eyes. The film is also notable for sterling performances by two legendary British actors who portray the aforementioned English scientists.

Peter Cushing and Christopher Lee have appeared in numerous films together, but Horror Express is arguably the film in which they share the best chemistry. The film also benefits from a period setting and old fashioned characters which imbue it with a classic Hammer horror feel, rather than the Spanish production that it really is.

Who Can Kill a Child? (Chicho Ibáñez Serrador, 1976)

Following a disturbing, black-and-white documentary-style introduction, depicting children as victims of numerous manmade conflicts worldwide, we meet Tom and Evelyn, an English couple on holiday in Spain. Tom is eager to take his pregnant wife to Almanzora, a remote island he once visited before; untouched by the hustle and bustle of tourism. Upon arrival, they discover the adults are missing and the children behaving very strangely.

When Tom and Evelyn eventually encounter an adult, it’s an elderly man being beaten to death with his walking stick by a giggling young girl. Tom becomes even more horrified when the victim is hoisted onto the rafters and used by the children as a sick type of piñata. Tom attempts to shield Evelyn from the truth but is unsuccessful as the children eventually pursue the English couple.

The manner in which the children became psychotic murderers is not clearly explained, but it appears that their psychopathy is transmitted to other youngsters like a telepathic virus.

Grim, downbeat and utterly enthralling, Who Can Kill a Child? is one of the most underrated ‘70s horror movies ever.

Zombie Flesh Eaters (Lucio Fulci, 1979)

After a pair of patrolmen encounter an undead looking CeeLo Green on a boat adrift in New York's harbour, a young American woman and a British journalist travel to the Caribbean island of Matool to uncover the mystery of her missing father and how on earth a zombie was on his boat.

This peak era Fulci film is blessed with a beatbox-worthy theme, Tisa Farrow seemingly having no clue what is going on, the most W.A.S.P.y-looking Italian actor ever, and an unforgettable underwater fight scene between a shark and a zombie. But what makes Zombie Flesh Eaters also special is watching a couple of English thespians treating this ultra gory, Italian splatterfest classic with the same level of professionalism as a Michelangelo Antonioni film.

Richard Johnson plays the dishevelled Dr. Maynard, obsessing over the supernatural phenomena of the dead coming back to life. His research comes at the expense of neglecting his rightfully hysterical wife, who is also stuck on Matool with him. Meanwhile, Ian McCulloch is hilarious as the investigative journalist Peter West trying it on as an action man with a ridiculous comb over. Both British characters make valiant attempts to keep a stiff upper lip in this unofficial sequel to Dawn of Dead. Therefore, it's all the more fun when their British reserve clashes with Fulci's sense of nihilism.”Out there! They're coming back to life! They're everywhere!”  

Sexy Beast (Jonathan Glazer, 2000)

Retired gangster Gary ‘Gal’ Dove is living a comfortable life with his wife DeeDee in their sun-kissed villa in Spain. The couple spend their days with friends Aitch and Jackie. While tanning his leathery hide, a boulder rolls down the nearby mountain and shatters the double-heart tiles of Gal’s swimming pool. This accident proves to be an ominous sign, as Don Logan, a former colleague of Gal’s, announces his arrival.

Don’s objective is to enrol Gal in a London heist orchestrated by his superior, Teddy Bass. However, Don’s refusal to accept no from the former safecracker leads to the expatriates being subjected to a tirade of intimidation by the ruthless psychopath; with Gal being the most severely affected. When the foursome foolishly think they are rid of the London gangster, their living nightmare returns back to them after intentionally and hilariously getting himself kicked off his plane.

I feel obligated to quote Don Logan's comical get-out-of-jail dialogue whilst being detained by airport security, as it could have very easily been a short skit off the foul-mouthed Derek & Clive comedy albums: 

Don Logan: Before you start, I wanna say something. Let me ask you something, please. Have you ever been sexually assaulted? No, neither have I. Until today, on that plane.

Airport Security Officer: What?

Don Logan: Yeah! That's what I said. There's me putting my bag up in the cupboard, next thing you know, I feel hands on me. Someone's touched me, touched my front... my front bottom. I can't believe it! I've gone all cold. I look 'round. He's standing there, isn't he? That steward with a guilty look on his face. I was shocked, I didn't know what to say. I had to sit down, I was that perturbed. And then his mate, the other one, who was giving us all lessons on what we'll all do if we land in the sea, how to work your life jacket etc, he starts and all. Starts looking at me all funny. Suggestive. Now, I don't know whether they wanted me for a twos-up, or something, I don't know how they work it, but I'll tell you what, it scared me, I was shaking like a leaf. So, without thinking, I lit up a cigarette to calm me nerves. I was trembling. I was very emotional. And that's when all the rest of it happened. It's very regrettable. Now, I don't want to kick up a fuss, right? Press charges, contact the British Embassy. I'd rather not pursue those channels. Not my style. Not that sort of a bloke. I wouldn't want to lose the man his job. A man's got to eat. And, I'm sure he's not representative of all you Spanish people. But I would appreciate it if you have a word with him. Let him know he's been rumbled. It's the one with the ginger hair. 

Ray Winstone and Ben Kingsley deliver phenomenal performances; the latter’s acidic verbal abuse and menacing appearance are particularly noteworthy, while Winstone contrasts it with perfect nuance to balance the film. Additionally, Ian McShane delivers a brooding and threatening performance as Teddy, which is not as widely recognised as it deserves to be.

Overall, Jonathan Glazer’s debut is a masterpiece that stands well and truly above the once popular wave of British gangster films released in the late 1990s and early 2000s. Today, its peers are largely forgotten, while Sexy Beast has gained even greater recognition as a landmark of British cinema.

Berberian Sound Studio (Peter Strickland, 2012)

When British sound engineer Gilderoy is hired to work on a film in Rome, he did not anticipate that The Equestrian Vortex would be an Italian horror film. Its egotistical director, Giancarlo Santini, wouldn't call it that, however. The film maker even feels insulted by the description: “This is not a horror film. This is not a horror film. This is a Santini film.”

A significant aspect of Peter Strickland’s film is the psychologically abusive treatment of the timid English sound engineer by both the production staff and the various eccentric individuals in the studio. With the exception of Silvia, a voice actress, they are openly rude and hostile towards him. Despite his creative sound engineering skills, he is assigned menial tasks such as chopping fruit and vegetables for foley work. All to replicate the sounds of the various decapitations and dismemberments we never see in Santini's film. Furthermore, he is subjected to an unending bureaucratic delay when attempting to claim a refund for his flight expenses. The entire experience is hell for our reserved protagonist, who opines to be back home in the English suburbs.

Berberian Sound Studio becomes increasingly surreal over its duration, leaving the viewer uncertain whether the strange events are real or a product of Gilderoy’s unhinged imagination. The metaphorical levels of a stranger in a strange land become more apparent when the protagonist becomes consumed by the film himself. At one point he appears on screen, subsequentially talking in fluent Italian, too. Thus, the lines of reality are blurred. Which makes Berberian Sound Studio similar to most of David Lynch's films. 

 

Honourable mentions: The Man Who Would Be King (1975) and Deep Red (1975).

I only watched Our Man in Havana (1959) for the very first time a few days ago, and as much I really liked it, I thought it was a bit rich if I included it here. 

Friday, July 24, 2026

20/2020s

The Zone of Interest (Jonathan Glazer, 2023)
Dinner in America (Adam Rehmeier, 2020)
The Northman (Robert Eggers, 2022)
Mad God (Phil Tippett, 2021)
The Substance (Coralie Fargeat, 2024)
Obsession (Curry Barker, 2025)
Benedetta (Paul Verhoeven, 2021)
Hatching (Hanna Bergholm, 2022)
No One Will Save You (Brian Duffield, 2023)
Crimes of the Future (David Cronenberg, 2022)
Furiosa: A Mad Max Story (George Miller, 2024)
Godzilla Minus One (Takashi Yamazaki, 2023)
R.R.R. (S.S. Rajamouli, 2022)
Deadstream (Joseph Winter & Vanessa Winter, 2022)
Last Night in Soho (Edgar Wright, 2021)
MadS (David Moreau, 2024)
The Furious (Kenji Tanigaki, 2025)
Apples (Christos Nikou, 2020)
Anora (Sean Baker, 2024)
Warfare (Ray Mendoza & Alex Garland, 2025)

If you're unfamiliar with the 20/2020s meta, it's essentially your top twenty films of the decade.

It took me just over six and a half years to complete this; which is about six years longer than the average Letterboxd user when they compiled one.

I wouldn’t say I’m a stickler for perfection, but it took me a while to find enough worthy films that cut through all the noise and glazing. The list is also a constant reminder that I haven't reviewed Dinner in America or Last Night in Soho yet.

With three years and some change left, there are bound to be a bunch of future titles which will qualify and switch up the current list above. At least, I hope so. Imagine the cultural landscape if there weren’t.

Thursday, July 16, 2026

Picks of 2016

2016 was a year for the underdog, a sentiment reflected in several films I enjoyed. Korean horror, low budget thrillfests and problematic action films were my personal highlights in a period dominated by endless comic book movies, unwanted remakes and shameless sequels. No change from any other year then.

The Autopsy of Jane Doe (André Øvredal)
The Belko Experiment (Greg McLean)
Don't Breathe (Fede Álvarez) 
The Girl with All the Gifts (Colm McCarthy) 
Hotel Coolgardie (Pete Gleeson)
Hush (Mike Flanagan)
London Has Fallen (Babak Najafi) 
The Neon Demon (Nicolas Winding Refn)
The Nice Guys (Shane Black) 
The Shallows (Jaume Collet-Serra)
Terrifier (Damien Leone) 
Train to Busan (Yeon Sang-ho)
The Wailing (Na Hong-jin)

I remember being mostly positive about Rogue One: A Star Wars Story, but I've not cared for anything Star Wars related after the deluge of awful films and TV shows ever since. 

Sunday, March 8, 2026

Ladies First

In honour of International Women’s Day, here's a list of films that I consider female-centric. This eclectic selection includes both well-known titles and lesser-known works that are often overlooked by clickbait film sites and terminally online Letterboxd hags.

Dementia (John Parker, 1955)
Diabolique (Henri-Georges Clouzot, 1955) 
The Violent Years (William Morgan, 1956)
Beat Girl (Edmond T. Gréville, 1959)
Eyes Without a Face (Georges Franju, 1960)
What Ever Happened to Baby Jane? (Robert Aldrich, 1962) 
The Demon (Brunello Rondi, 1963)
The Girl Who Knew Too Much (1963) 
The Whip and the Body (Mario Bava, 1963) 
White Slaves of Chinatown (Joseph P. Mawra, 1964) 
Bad Girls Go to Hell (Doris Wishman, 1965)
Bunny Lake Is Missing (Otto Preminger, 1965) 
Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill! (Russ Meyer, 1965)
The Nanny (Seth Holt, 1965)
Repulsion (Roman Polanski, 1965) 
Belle de Jour (Luis Buñuel, 1967) 
Barbarella (Roger Vadim, 1968)
Rosemary's Baby (Roman Polanski, 1968) 
The Laughing Woman (Piero Schivazappa, 1969)
And Soon the Darkness (Robert Fuest, 1970) 
Eugenie de Sade (Jesús Franco, 1970)
The Vampire Lovers (Roy Ward Baker, 1970) 
The Big Doll House (Jack Hill, 1971)
Daughters of Darkness (Harry Kümel, 1971)
Valerie and Her Week of Wonders (Jaromil Jireš, 1971) 
Female Prisoner #701: Scorpion (Shunya Itō, 1972)
Your Vice Is a Locked Room and Only I Have the Key (Sergio Martin, 1972) 
Coffy (Jack Hill, 1973)
The Doll Squad (Ted V. Vikels, 1973)
The Iron Rose (Jean Rollin, 1973) 
Lady Snowblood (Toshiya Fujita, 1973) 
Act of Vengeance (Bob Kelijan, 1974) 
Big Bad Mama (Steve Carver, 1974) 
Caged Heat (Jonathan Demme, 1974)
House of Whipcord (Pete Walker, 1974)
Messiah of Evil (Willard Huyck, Gloria Katz, 1974)
Vampyres (José Ramón Larraz, 1974) 
Ilsa: She-Wolf of the S.S. (Don Edmonds, 1975)
Footprints on the Moon (Luigi Bazzoni, Mario Fanelli, 1975) 
Picnic at Hanging Rock (Peter Weir, 1975) 
The Switchblade Sisters (Jack Hill, 1975)
Carrie (Brian De Palma, 1976) 
Rabid (David Cronenberg, 1977)
The Sentinel (Michael Winner, 1977) 
Suspiria (Dario Argento, 1977) 
I Spit on Your Grave (Meir Zarchi, 1978)
The Lady in Red (Lewis Teague, 1979)
Ms. 45 (Abel Ferrara, 1981)
The Living Dead Girl (Jean Rollin, 1982) 
Chained Heat (Paul Nicholas, 1983)
Angel (Robert Vincent O'Neill, 1984)
Nikita (Luc Besson, 1990) 
Singapore Sling (Nikos Nikolaidis, 1990)
The Silence of the Lambs (Jonathan Demme, 1991) 
Serial Mom (John Waters, 1994) 
Bound (Lana Wachowski, Lilly Wachowski, 1996)
The Long Kiss Goodnight (Renny Harlin, 1996) 
A Gun for Jennifer (Todd Morris, 1997) 
Perfect Blue (Satoshi Kon, 1997) 
Audition (Takashi Miike, 1999) 
Mulholland Drive (David Lynch, 2001)
May (Lucky McKee, 2002) 
The Descent (Neil Marshall, 2005) 
Amer (Hélène Cattet, Bruno Forzani, 2009)
The Loved Ones (Sean Byrne, 2009)
Triangle (Christopher Smith, 2009)
Black Swan (Darren Aronofsky, 2010) 
Excision (Richard Bates Jr, 2012) 
Nymphomaniac (Lars Von Trier, 2013)
The Babadook (Emily Kent, 2014) 
Starry Eyes ( Dennis Widmyer, Kevin Kölsch, 2014)
The Neon Demon (Nicolas Winding Refn, 2016)
Revenge (Coralie Forgeat, 2017) 
Midsommar (Ari Aster, 2019) 
Benedetta (Paul Verhoeven, 2021)
Censor (Prano Bailey-Bond, 2021) 
Last Night in Soho (Edgar Wright, 2021) 
Hatching (Hanna Bergholm, 2022)
The Royal Hotel (Kitty Green, 2023) 
Love Lies Bleeding (Rose Glass, 2024) 
Anora (Sean Baker, 2024)
Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga (George Miller, 2024) 
The Substance (Coralie Forgeat, 2024)
The Ugly Stepsister (Emilie Blichfeldt, 2025) 

Compiling a list such as this, particularly when it includes many films prior to the #MeToo era, reveals how cultural opinions can change over time. Titles once considered misogynistic are now praised as essential feminist cinema. This demonstrates the unpredictability of cultural attitudes and the importance of not censoring the past.

Sunday, December 21, 2025

Best Old Films Discovered in 2025

As a realist, the chances of ever discovering a lost giallo on par with Tenebrae are none. As a dreamer, I'm watching dud after dud like Sideshow Bob stepping on rakes to prove myself wrong, regardless. That's why I'm always excited to watch an unfamiliar film as if it might potentially be a long, lost treasure. Granted, there could be booby traps everywhere, but occasionally you do find that precious gem. And that's what this lot of films are for your host:

The Mask of Fu Manchu (Charles Brabin, 1932)
The Mask of Fu Manchu is an outrageous, yet amusing gem from the pre-Code era. Like one of Fu Manchu's concoctions, the fact that it's over ninety years old and still a potent mix of sex, sadism and racism, makes it cinematic gold for me. ★★★★
 
Scarlet Street (Fritz Lang, 1945)
Fritz Lang’s morality tale unfolds unpredictably, shifting from melodrama to comedy before ending on a sour note. Edward G. Robison embodies the male mid-life crisis, while Joan Bennett is the quintessential femme fatale. Superb noir. ★★★★
 
Gun Crazy (Joseph H. Lewis, 1950)
Incredibly sexually suggestive film involving a Bonnie and Clyde like duo of gun nuts. In most films, there is a natural inclination to root for the underdog, in the case of Gun Crazy, this is particularly evident in the outlaw couple’s thrilling and tense heists. The film also stands out for its remarkably modern filmmaking style which has earned it a reputation for being ahead of its time. ★★★★
 
Yield to the Night (J. Lee Thompson, 1956)
Thompson, a staunch opponent of capital punishment, delivers a powerful film from his early oeuvre. Yield to the Night also showcases the acting talents of Diana Dors who shuns her glamourous image to demonstrate her acting abilities as a sympathetic prisoner awaiting her execution. It is unfortunate that Dors never had the opportunity to demonstrate her skills in more of her work, as her performance in this is exceptionally strong. ★★★½
 
The Demon (Brunello Rondi, 1963)
Daliah Lavi delivers a fantastic performance as a beautiful peasant woman whose rejection by her lover leads to madness and despair. To the town locals, she is a possessed woman. This unconventional Italian horror, shot in a mondo style at times, draws damning parallels between peasant superstitions and the Catholic Church. Highly recommended. ★★★★
 
Incubus (Leslie Stevens, 1966)
Despite its reputation as a poorly received and cursed film, Incubus exceeded my expectations. In fact, I actually found it to be a very good film. The pretentiousness of the Esperanto dialogue and its pretence of emulating an European art house production were not detracting factors, either. They were all part of its surreal charm. I also found William Shatner’s performance to be superb, too. A remarkably strange film that is undeserving of its negative reputation. ★★★½
 
The Ear (Karel Kachyňa, 1970)
Ludvík, a deputy minister, returns home from a political gathering with his intoxicated wife, Anna. Upon arrival, they encounter unsettling events, leading to paranoia and anxiety. Flashbacks reveal potential clues to their dire predicament. A tense and paranoid thriller, expertly filling a jigsaw puzzle and a fractured relationship over the course of the night  This was easily the standout title amongst the Eastern Bloc films I discovered this year. ★★★½
 
Night of the Juggler (Robert Butler, Sidney J. Furie, 1980)
Night of the Juggler is a film that really has earned its cult following. It’s a fascinating blend of sleaze, violence and a delightful nod to unapologetic film making seldom made today. It will definitely find appreciation by anyone who loves gritty crime thrillers from the 1970s and early 1980s. It’s packed with a dark and cynical atmosphere and keeps you on the edge of your seat with genuine suspense and tension. ★★★½
 
The Cat (Lam Nai-Choi, 1992)
The Cat is an amazingly eccentric film that should appeal to anyone with an interest in unconventional and whimsical films from around the world. Its influences are evident yet it instils its own brand of bizarre entertainment; making it a unique viewing experience. ★★★★
 
Tesis AKA Thesis (Alejandro Amenábar, 1996)
Alejandro Amenábar’s Hichcockian style thriller, centred on snuff tapes, is notable for its abundant plot twists and its red herrings. This is a particularly impressive film given its obvious low budget and the fact that it was written and directed by a 23-year-old film graduate shooting in his university. ★★★½

Cure (Kiyoshi Kurosawa, 1997)
A chilling psychological thriller that makes me question why I didn’t watch it sooner. Unlike typical police procedurals, it develops in a rich, nuanced and intelligent way. It’s a slow-burn shocker that lingers on, especially after that final scene. Its subesequent influence on J-horror seems very obvious, in retrospect. ★★★★½
 
The Platform (Galder Gaztelu-Urrutia, 2019) 
The Platform is a disturbing film; brutal, nihilistic and difficult to recommend to the squeemish. However, its most extreme aspect is its sci-fi concept. The brutalist construct that confines everyone to various levels serves as an allegory for both capitalism and the class system. Can't believe I slept on this film for so long. ★★★★ 
 
In hindsight, there were a few films which grew on me the more I marinated on them. At the very least, they warranted an honourable mention here: 
 
Mystery of the Wax Museum (Michael Curtiz, 1933) 
Phantom Lady (Robert Siodmak, 1944)
Where the Sidewalk Ends (Otto Preminger, 1950)
Assault! Jack the Ripper (Yasuharu Hasebe, 1976) 
Her Vengeance (Lam Nai-Choi, 1988)
Polytechnique (Denis Villeneuve, 2009)  

Thursday, December 18, 2025

Best Films of 2025

With so many so-called blockbusters, Oscar-bait films and international sleepers, I managed to see 37 titles released in 2025 which potentially appealed to me; some of which were technically released in another country last year. The overall quality was slim pickings and a substantial downgrade compared to the previous year. Anyway, here are the best new films I saw:

Warfare (Alex Garland & Ray Mendoza)
A gripping and intense story based on the memories of two Navy SEAL platoons involved in a tense firefight after the Battle of Ramadi in 2006. It’s a tough film to watch due to its harrowing and uncompromising nature. Both the sound and visuals made me regret not seeing it in the cinema during its brief theatrical run. ★★★★
 
The Ugly Stepsister (Emillie Blichfeldt)
Emillie Blichfeldt’s twisted take on the classic Cinderella fairytale is a grotesque critique of impossible beauty standards and its prestigious value in society. Inspired by Cronenberg’s body horror and Borowczyk’s baroque erotica, it’s one of this year’s unexpected surprises. Glad Second Sight is releasing it on 4K UHD early next year. ★★★½
 
Steppenwolf (Adilkhan Yerzhanov)  
From Kazakhstan comes a bleak and brutal post-western featuring a protagonist who's more villainous than the archetypal antihero we're accustomed to. The contrast of life being treated worthlessly against the stunning vista of the Kazakh Steppe evokes the post-apocalyptic Mad Max films by George Miller. ★★★½
 
Weapons (Zach Cregger)
Cregger’s sophomore effort, a compelling mystery about the disappearance of a school class during the night, unfolds through non-linear chapters told through the perspectives of individual characters. It’s a surprisingly engrossing slow burner featuring one of this year’s most ghastly film characters. ★★★½
 
Nosferatu (Robert Eggers)
You know it's been an abysmal year for cinema when Robert Eggers's weakest effort thus far still makes it on your end of year list. It's also testament to the auteur's skills and talents surpassing any major misgivings I had with his remake of the bootleg Dracula tale. ★★★½

28 Years Later (Danny Boyle) 
Danny Boyle and Alex Garland created what's arguably the most significant game changer for zombie movies since George A. Romero’s Night of the Living Dead (1968) with 28 Days Later (2002). Their return to the franchise proved to be highly divisive, as it diverged from audience expectations. Despite this, I found it fascinating to learn about the evolution of the Rage virus along with a ravaged Great Britain. What I didn't expect were a compelling family drama and a commentary on Brexit. ★★★½

Lurker (Alex Russell)
Alex Russell’s directorial debut is a gripping psychodrama about a disturbed fan’s parasocial relationship with a rising celebrity. The film’s cringe-worthy moments and awkwardness are so intense that they leave you feeling unclean. Théodore Pellerin and Archie Madekwe deliver great performances. ★★★½
 
The Surfer (Lorcan Finnegan) 
Nicolas Cage undergoing some form of mental breakdown or existential crisis has practically become a genre in itself. Lorcan Finnegan’s The Surfer is a surreal comedy and psychological thriller that showcases Cage’s talents and the best film I've watched set mostly in a parking lot. Cage's most entertaining movie since Mandy (2018). ★★★½
 
Warfare | Opening minutes
Alex Garland & Ray Mendoza | 2025
 
 
Around this time of year, I usually try to be open-minded and hope to find notable films I might have missed in the foreseeable future. However, for the time being, I’ve really had enough. The output was so poor to mediocre that I can't even be bothered with compiling a Worst of 2025 list.
 
I hope 2026 is a significant improvement, or else I might lose my mind.

Monday, November 24, 2025

Picks of 1975

It's been fifty years since the term summer blockbuster entered the modern lexicon. That's largely attributed to Steven Spielberg's Jaws being one of the greatest box office success stories ever; as well as being culturally impactful, even today. Therefore, it would lay down the blueprint for event movies ever since.

Picks:

Autopsy (Armando Crispino) 
Brannigan (Douglas Hickox) 
Bucktown (Arthur Marks)
Countess Perverse (Jesús Franco)  
Deep Red (Dario Argento)
The Devil's Rain (Robert Fuest) 
The Eiger Sanction (Clint Eastwood)
Eyeball (Umberto Lenzi) 
Footprints on the Moon (Luigi Bazzoni, Mario Fanelli) 
French Connection II (John Frankenheimer) 
Jaws (Steven Spielberg) 
Lips of Blood (Jean Rollin) 
Monty Python and the Holy Grail (Terry Gilliam, Terry Jones) 
Night of the Seagulls (Amando de Ossorio) 
Race with the Devil (Jack Starrett) 
Rollerball (Norman Jewison) 
Shivers (David Cronenberg)
Supervixens (Russ Meyer)

Glaring Blind Spots:

Dog Day Afternoon (Sidney Lumet); Hard Times (Walter Hill); and Night Moves (Arthur Penn).

Could have added a few more to the list, like The Stepford Wives, but way too much time has passed since last seeing any of them. No idea if they still hold up.

* Still banned outright today by the BBFC.

Monday, September 29, 2025

Picks of 1985

You can sum up 1985 as the year when Arnold Schwarzenegger, Chuck Norris and the legendary veteran Charles Bronson earned higher body counts than Prince. On the subject of 80s action heroes, let it be known that Sylvester Stallone did more for world peace than any stoner hippie, glorified philosopher or corporate sponsored politician by ending the Cold War with one of the greatest movie speeches of all time. 

After Hours (Martin Scorsese)
Back to the Future (Robert Zemeckis)
The Boys Next Door (Penelope Spheeris) 
Brazil (Terry Gilliam)
The Breakfast Club (John Hughes)
Commando (Mark L. Lester) 
Day of the Dead (George A. Romero)
Death Wish 3 (Michael Winner) 
Flesh + Blood (Paul Verhoeven)
Fright Night (Tom Holland)
The Goonies (Richard Donner)
Invasion U.S.A. (Joseph Zito) 
Mad Max: Beyond Thunderdome (George Miller, George Ogilvie)
The Mean Season (Philip Borsos) 
Mr. Vampire (Ricky Lau)
Phenomena (Dario Argento)
Police Story (Jackie Chan) 
The Quiet Earth (Geoff Murphy)
Rambo: First Blood Part II (George P. Cosmatos) 
Ran (Akira Kurosawa) 
Re-Animator (Stuart Gordon) 
Rocky IV (Sylvester Stallone) 
Silver Bullet (Daniel Attias)
The Stuff (Larry Cohen) 
To Live and Die in L.A. (William Friedkin)
Weird Science (John Hughes)
Witness (Peter Weir) 

Blindspots & Incomplete Viewings:

The Coca-Cola Kid (Dušan Makavejev); Come and See (Elem Klimov); Confessions of a Serial Killer (Mark Blair); Crimewave (Sam Raimi); Into the Night (John Landis); The Last Dragon (Michael Shultz); Legend (Ridley Scott); Mishima: A Life in Four Chapters (Paul Schrader); Pale Rider (Clint Eastwood); Runaway Train (Andrei Konchalovsky); Teen Wolf (Rod Daniel); Typhoon Club (Shinji Sōmai)

1985 was a treasure trove for perfect musical montages and needledrops gracing various films. A personal fave is the scene from William Friedkin's To Live and Die in L.A. when Willem Dafoe makes counterfeit bills and Wang Chung's City of the Angels plays.

To Live and Die in L.A. | Making Counterfeit Money Scene
William Friedkin | 1985 

Tuesday, May 20, 2025

Picks of 1995

My opinion on Brit Pop might have softened over the years, but if you weren't one of the brainwashed lot into it in 1995, you were pretty much treated like an outcast at the Student Union bar. Anyway, here's Wonderwall my list of films from that year:

12 Monkeys (Terry Gilliam)
The Addiction (Abel Ferrara)
The Blade (Tsui Hark)
Casino (Martin Scorsese)
Castle Freak (Stuart Gordon)
Die Hard with a Vengeance (John McTiernan)
GoldenEye (Martin Campbell)
Screamers (Christian Duguay) 
Se7en (David Fincher)
Shallow Grave (Danny Boyle)
Toy Story (John Lasseter)
The Usual Suspects (Bryan Singer)
Village of the Damned (John Carpenter)

Famke Janssen as Xenia Onatopp from GoldenEye (1995). Just because.

Don't know if this lot still hold up, but I though they were good initially: Citizen X (Chris Gerolmo); Clockers (Spike Lee); La Haine (Mathieu Kassovitz); Tales from the Crypt: Demon Knight (Ernest R. Dickerson); Kids (Larry Clark); Rumble in the Bronx (Stanley Tong); Species (Roger Donaldson); and Sudden Death (Peter Hyams). Have not seen them ever since.

The film I'm eager to revisit is Paul Verhoeven's Showgirls. Once regarded as terrible when it was released, but it seems to have undergone a complete 180 as some kind of misunderstood masterpiece. Want to judge for myself, on account of it being a Verhoeven film. I thought it was mediocre when I first watched it, however.

Thursday, May 1, 2025

King for a Day

The Wicker Man (Robin Hardy, 1973)

Christopher Lee's chilling line, "Come, it is time to keep your appointment with the Wicker Man," to the doomed Edward Woodward, never rang more true for your host. That's because, for one reason or another, I've delayed a dedicated write-up on Robin Hardy's masterpiece The Wicker Man (1973); even missing its 50th anniversary. Here's my attempt at making amends, by reviewing it on the most apt day of the year for the film — on May Day — and discuss this triumph of British cinema in an ungodly length. Come say, "How do?" to The Wicker Man.

David Batholomew famously described it as "The Citizen Kane of Horror films," in a dedicated issue of Cinemafantisque. This low budget indie film is often mentioned in various Greatest Ever Films list (albeit, much lower down the ladder from Citizen Kane). It's also credited as being the granddaddy of folk horror, despite earlier examples Witchfinder General (1968) and The Blood of Satan's Claw (1971) preceding it by a few years. However, those films haven't sewn the same cultural influence like The Wicker Man. It's hard coded into various other media and not just other films. From  television, music, video games and numerous other forms of entertainment, Hardy's classic film has left an indelible mark.

What initially began as a film treatment for a potential Michael Winner film, which related to a murder investigation involving Cornish pagans, author Andrew Pinner, would go it alone and turn it his 1967 novel Ritual  The book would eventually fall into the hands of play writer Anthony Shaffer, who, along with fellow writer and business partner, Robin Hardy, were interested in producing it into a horror film. The pair were both disillusioned with the current state of horror films, and were looking to try something more uniquely serious. With the aid of the legendary actor Christopher Lee, who also shared a similar sentiment with them regarding the state of horror films, and producer Peter Snell, they obtained the rights to Pinner's book for the princely sum of £15,000. With major refining and tinkering, Shaffer's screenplay would wind up being almost entirely different to its original source material. 

Various pagan rituals featured in Shaffer's screenplay were sourced from Scottish anthropologist, Sir James George Frazer's 1890 book The Golden Bough. A famous compendium dedicated to detailing various ancient religions, rituals and practices. Eagle-eyed viewers who have seen Apocalypse Now (1979) might have spotted the book on Colonel Kurtz's desk. Shaffer was particularly influenced by fertility rites and human sacrifices which were chronicled in the Frazer's tome. These elements played an integral part in The Wicker Man's mystery plot. The screenwriter was no stranger, in this department, having written both Frenzy (1972) and Sleuth (1972).

Devout Christian, Sergeant Neil Howie (Edward Woodward) of the West Highlands Police, receives an anonymous letter regarding the disappearance of Rowan Morrison, a young girl from the remote Scottish island of Summerisle. The island is famed for its bountiful produce, notably its luscious apples, but seldom visited by outsiders. Piloting his sea plane, the bobby heads to Summerisle. The locals appear unwelcoming at first. Showing a photo of the missing child, the locals don't recognise her. The harbour master denies ever seeing the young girl before, yet knows her mother May Morrison.

Although, not Robin Hardy's first choice to play the Sgt. Howie — he wanted actor Michael York, originally — Edward Woodward would prove to be an excellent choice with his superb performance as the pious and uptight investigator. According to Woodward, he wore a police uniform a size too small to give him his an authoritarian like composure and stance. This physical restriction would affect how he would deliver his lines as well. As such, he would play the straight man to the various jesters on Summerisle, before the turning of the tables.

Sgt. Howie's first port of call is the local post office/sweet shop run by May. Aside from the strange confectionery on display, what's more peculiar, is May Morrison denying ever having a daughter called Rowan. Furthermore, she leads the policeman to the back of her shop where her daughter Myrtle doing a painting of a March hare. Briefly alone with the child, Sgt. Howie is told by Myrtle that Rowan does indeed exist, but she is in the fields and she is a March hare, like her painting.

Tired from his trip to the island and questioning the batshit locals, Sgt. Howie rents a room at the boisterously loud, Green Man Inn. Without a shadow of a doubt, one of the greatest boozers ever featured in film. It's run by pub landlord Alder MacGregor (Lindsey Kemp) and his barmaid daughter Willow (Britt Ekland). The drunk and rowdy locals are the icing on the proverbial cake singing some utter filth regarding Willow's appeal, that would make Luther Campbell blush. The policeman is more intrigued by the obvious absence of last year's Harvest Festival photograph not being amongst all the other prior ones adorning the wall. He also isn't too pleased with the pub meal he's been served as it's mostly from a tin. Considering Summerisle's bountiful produce, it's an oddity for him to be served preserved beans and potatoes along with the miniscule lamb chop on his plate.

You would be forgiven for thinking The Wicker Man is just as much a musical as it is a horror film. Music plays an important part in the film. American songwriter Paul Giovanni wrote and scored new songs with acid folk band Magnet. These tracks perfectly complimented medieval melodies, Robert Burns ditties, and traditional nursery rhymes. Much of the music evokes a pre-Christian Britain  —  Pagan times. Hence, a private Scottish island, secluded from the rest of the world, worshipping the God of the Sun and Goddess of the Orchard, might even be somewhat believable in the late 20th century. Giovanni's score really impresses when it signals the sinister tone of the film in the third act; when Sgt. Howie realises he can't get back to the mainland after his plane has been sabotaged. It's complimented with sinister sounding strings while masked figures peer at the lawman from behind a stone wall.

Depending on which cut of the film you watch, Lord Summerisle (Christopher Lee) the local landowner, makes his first appearance outside of Willow's bedroom. His purpose is to present Ash Buchanan, a young lad who has come of age to lose his cherry with the local slosh pot. Whilst the folk band (consisting of the film's composer Paul Giovanni and his group Magnet) play the slow and risqué number, Gently Johnny, to the pair's orgasmic moans, Lord Summerisle admires two snails also rutting like his Sir David Attenborough. 

Lord Summerisle: I think I could turn and live with animals. They are so placid and self-contained. They do not lie awake in the dark and weep for their sins. They do not make me sick discussing their duty to God. Not one of them kneels to another or to his own kind that lived thousands of years ago. Not one of them is respectable or unhappy, all over the earth.

Robin Hardy perfectly drives home The Wicker Man's themes of sex and fertility. As such, the Summerisle community's openly permissive attitudes come across as immoral, indecent and corruptive to the pious Sgt. Howie's moral beliefs.

An early and pivotal scene is set inside Miss Rose's (Diane Cilento) classroom. Sgt. Howie presumes the empty desk is Rowan's. Opening it, he finds a beetle tied to a thread and nail. Daisy Pringle (Lesley Mackie), the world's oldest looking school girl, mischievously grins, "The little old beetle goes 'round and 'round. Always the same way, you see, until it ends up right up tight to the nail. Poor old thing!" It serves as metaphoric foreshadowing to what befalls our film's protagonist.

Australian actress Diane Cilento, who had split from her husband Sean Connery in 1971, was cast after Shaffer had seen her perform in a stage play. Not knowing her name at the time, Shaffer managed to track her down and convinced the actress to be in the film, despite her being retired from acting at the time. Of all the three lead actresses in the film, Cilento seems the most skilled, in my opinion. She would even choreograph the young maiden's fire dance. During the film shoot, Cilento and Shaffer would become involved in a relationship. They would eventually tie the knot in 1985.

Perhaps the most shocking revelation for the Christian copper, is the desecrated church on Summerisle.  It shows his devout faith being abandoned on the island. Passing a woman breastfeeding her baby (while also holding an egg ), Sgt. Howie finds an empty apple crate and fashions a crucifix with it. He places it on the abandoned church altar. A vain attempt by at restoring some semblance of all that is dear to him back to the island.

Sgt. Howie runs into an old gardener (played by the recognisable Aubrey Morris) who tends to the graves. It turns out, he plants trees on the graves. Asking about one specific tree growing from an unmarked grave, Sgt. Howie learns it's a rowan tree growing from Rowan Morrison's grave. Realising this, the policeman asks when Rowan died. "Oh, six or seven months," says the gardener "they're just a wee bit late with the headstone." Sgt. Howie is intrigued with a bizarre strip, resembling what could be skin, hanging from the small rowan tree. Puzzled, he asks what it is, "the poor wee lassie's navel string, of course," replies the gardener. "Where else should it be, but hung on her own little tree?" One must ask, where are all the umbilical cords stored before they're hung on trees when the citizens die?

Returning to the May Morrison's shop, Sgt. Howie walks in to see sympathetic magic taking place, as Rowan's younger sister, Myrtle, is suffering from a sore throat. To cure it, May places a frog in the Myrtle's mouth. This is in order to transfer the young girl's sore throat to the frog instead. Myrtle's facial reaction is priceless (and exactly replicates my own upon first seeing the horrendous remake). The frog scene is just another wonderful moment in the alternative and bizarre methodologies adhered by the Summerisle residents. This is what makes The Wicker Man such as a deeply fascinating film, even when scenes like Myrtle's soar throat aren't really crucial to the main plot of the film.

Sgt. Howie then meets island's keeper of records, credited as The Librarian (none other than Hammer's very own Ingrid Pitt). Whilst interrupting her lunch of tinned peaches, the lawman checks the deaths registry and discovers there is no death certificate for Rowan Morrison. Despite the Librarian knowing Rowan, she can not answer how the girl died.

The casting of Pitt is a bizarre choice, as she still talks in her strong Polish accent, which makes little sense considering she's meant to be a resident of an isolated Scottish island. In any case, it doesn't hinder the film, as her dialogue is minimal, but it is noticeable. What might have been detrimental, however, was what she was up to during the film's shooting. Allegedly, Pitt was having an affair with the film's producer Peter Snell. This was all rather awkward since she was married to George Pinches at the time, the chief booker for the Rank Organisation cinema chain; which could one explain the film performing poorly, originally.

With no death certificate issued for Rowan, and the absence of photo in the Green Man, Sgt. Howie's next stop is T.H. Lennox (Donald Eccles), the local chemist and photo developer. Lennox also happens to be the events photographer for Summerisle. Much like Pitt's character, the elderly proprietor proves to be equally unhelpful when it comes to the subject of the Rowan Morrison. When shown a photograph of the missing girl, Sgt. Howie asks if Lennox is she was last year's Harvest Queen. The photographer appears dumbfounded and can not answer.

It's a minor scene in the film, but it's another great example of the strangeness of Summerisle. The character may be lying to Sgt. Howie, but there's more to unpack with the odd products on sale in Lennox's shop and what their uses are. From jars full of hearts, brains and even foreskins, it's not exactly Boots. For the life of me, I have no idea what pickled animals are in the tank next on the shop counter. At first I thought they were piglets, but their legs are too long. Might possibly be lambs. I honestly have no idea what these mutant looking dead creatures are.

With all the locals questioned, all roads lead to meeting Lord Summerisle himself in getting permission to exhume Rowan Morrison's grave, to find out once and for all is she is dead or not. On his way there, Sgt. Howie observes Miss Rose and a troupe of naked young girls fire dancing in a stone circle. 

Christopher Lee has often cited his role as the Lord Summerisle to be the greatest part he ever played. It's not hard to see why given considering he's a natural at playing iconic villains; and his character from The Wicker Man is a strong contender for being one his best. Lord Summerisle was tailor made for Christopher Lee in mind, which makes common sense given his extremely early involvement in its pre-production. Lee delivers heaps of charm, humour and personality to the mad lord of the island. Making him a mesmerising individual, yet a very dangerous one.

Lord Summerisle has loads of stellar lines, clever comebacks and stinging barbs. His entertaining dialogue  is a delight to listen to. The exchange between Sgt. Howie and Lord Summerisle during their first meeting is a particular favourite:

Sgt. Howie: What religion can they possibly be learning jumping over bonfires?
Lord Summerisle: Parthenogenesis.
Sgt. Howie: What?
Lord Summerisle: Literally, as Miss Rose would doubtless say in her assiduous way, reproduction without sexual union.
Sgt. Howie: Oh, what is all this? I mean, you've got fake biology, fake religion... Sir, have these children never heard of Jesus?
Lord Summerisle: Himself the son of a virgin, impregnated, I believe, by a ghost. Do sit down sergeant. Shocks are so much better absorbed with the knees bent. Please. Now those children out there, they're jumping through the flames in the hope that the God of Fire would make them fruitful. Really, you could hardly blame them. After all, what girl would not prefer the child of a god than to that of some acne-scarred artisan?
Sgt. Howie: And you encourage them in all this?
Lord Summerisle: Actively. It's most important that each new generation born on Summerisle be aware that the Old Gods aren't dead.
Sgt. Howie: But what of the true God to whose glory churches and monasteries have been built on these islands for generations past? Now, Sir, what of him?
Lord Summerisle: He's dead. He can't complain. He had his chance, and in the modern parlance, he blew it.
 
After their meeting, Lord Summerisle's off-screen farewell to Sgt. Howie is hilarious. "It's been a great pleasure meeting a Christian copper." Hard to hate on a villain with a line like that.

The exhumation of Rowan's grave proves to be another dead end for our protagonist. Rowan's corpse is not in her coffin. Instead, it's that of a dead hare. Understandably angered, Sgt. Howie confronts Lord Summerisle again and tells his lordship he'll depart from the island in the morning and request an inquiry to his superiors. 

Before retiring for the night back, the lawman sneaks into Lennox's pharmacy and finds the negatives to last years Harvest Festival. With the aid of the store's dark room, he develops a photograph; it's Rowan, standing amongst a meagre collection of apples. This leads to the copper believing the young girl may still be alive, but she may be in danger of being sacrificed after the previous year's poor collection. It would also explain why so many of the locals are keen for Sgt. Howie to leave the island before the May Day festivities.

Back in his room, Sgt. Howie is ready to call it a night, but Willow has other plans. What follows is the film's unforgettable seduction scene. Lying naked on her bed, the buxom barmaid serenades Sgt. Howie in the other room. The band in the tavern below provide the music to her singing. Again, if you pay close attention to the lyrics in Willow's Song, it contains some pure filth in there: How a maid can milk a bull/ And every stroke a bucketful. The seduction scene is a significant moment in the film, that becomes more apparent in the finale of the film.

Although agreeing to go topless for Willow's infamous scene, Britt Ekland would not go completely in the buff. As a result, the scenes where she's dancing naked and slapping her arse, were performed by a body double. In an interview with the Daily Express, Ekland revealed, "For me anything below the waist is private so I was prepared to be topless on film but I would not show my bottom and my agent made that very clear...They brought in a body double one day when I was away from the set. No one told me, neither before nor after it happened. The first I knew about it was when the film came out and then I was in a state of shock. Her bottom was much bigger than mine and she wore a blonde wig that was longer than my own hair. It was ridiculous and I was very upset." In desperation, Hardy used a Glaswegian stripper for Willow's nude scenes. Ekland was also two months pregnant at the time, which might have been another reason why she was uncomfortable being in the nude.

The Swedish actress's voice was dubbed over with that of Scottish/American singer and actress Annie Ross. Hammer fans might know her for appearing in the highly underrated thriller Straight On Till Morning (1972), although Ross is best remembered for playing Robert Vaughn's sister turned cyborg in the shark-jumping Superman III (1983) and the high school principal Creswood in Pump Up the Volume (1990). However, Rachel Verney is the actual singer heard on Willow's Song in the film.

Before departing from Summerisle, Sgt. Howie makes a quick stop at the public library where he reads a passage from a book detailing May Day celebrations:

Sgt. Howie (narration): Primitive man lived and died by his harvest. The purpose of his spring ceremonies was to ensure a plentiful autumn. Relics of these fertility dramas are to be found all over Europe. In Great Britain, for example, one can still see harmless versions of them danced in obscure villages on May Day. Their cast includes many alarming characters: a man-animal, or hobbyhorse, who canters at the head of the procession, charging at the girls; a manwoman, the sinister teaser, played by the community leader or priest; and a man-fool, Punch, most complex of all the symbolic figures. The privileged simpleton and king for a day. Six swordsmen follow these figures, and at the climax of the ceremony, lock their swords together in a clear symbol of the sun. In Pagan times, however, these dancers were not simply picturesque jigs, they were frenzied rites ending in a sacrifice by which the dancers hoped desperately to win over the goddess of the fields. In good times, they offered produce to the gods and slaughtered animals, but in bad years, when the harvest had been poor... the sacrifice was a human being.

This is all further evidence of James George Frazer's The Golden Bough laying out the final act of the film, along with letting our protagonist still believe Rowan Morrison is still alive.

His return to the mainland is put on hold once he enters the cockpit of his plane. It won't start, scuppering his plans to get more help. And so begins a frantic search in every house looking for Rowan before it's too late. During this sequence, you see all the islander preparing for their big May Day celebrations.

With Rowan yet to be found, Sgt. Howie takes a wee breather back at the Green Man. Willow and her father aren't shy with their annoyances of the copper still being about on May Day. While pretending to be asleep, the barmaid places a gruesome severed hand, with fingers set alight like candles, on the protagonist's bedside table. Called the 'Hand of Glory', its supposedly put there for the snooping copper to sleep for the remainder of the day. Sgt. Howie knocks the 'Hand of Glory' over and stealthily creeps into the pub landlord's room and incapacitates him. He disguises himself with MacGregor's May Day costume — The Fool.

Dressed in MacGregor's costume, Sgt. Howie joins the May Day procession. Everything he read in the library about the festivities seems to have been faithfully followed by the Summerilse locals; including the hobby horse (or 'obby 'oss) and Lord Summerisle dressed as the aforementioned 'manwoman'.

Christopher Lee wearing a long dark wig and a purple dress whilst covered in white make-up, looks even more terrifying than some of his other famous horror characters. When he's wielding an axe and smashing ale barrels on the beach to appease the God of the Sea, I can't help but think how cool he would have been as the maniac killer in a slasher film. Of course, that would have been entirely beneath him.

"And now for our more dreadful sacrifice", Lord Summerisle menacingly says, "For those who command the fruits of the earth", he continues. From a nearby cave entrance is Rowan Morrison in a ceremonial gown, with her hands tied. Sgt. Howie rushes over, knocks out one of her captors and frees her. The both make their hasty escape through the cave entrance. Giovanni's folksy music is replaced with an uptempo acid rock number during this scene, and it's one the better tracks off the soundtrack, titled Horn At Cave - Cave Chase.

Rowan guides Sgt. Howie to an exit above the cave. They're greeted by Lord Summerisle and the rest of the islanders waiting for them. Rowan drops all pretences and reveals she was really in league with her fellow pagan community.

Finally, the film's mystery comes to an end. It was all an elaborate conspiracy, orchestrated by Lord Summerisle. Sgt. Howie would be their human sacrifice and enrich their harvest once more after last year's failure. Perhaps the greatest movie twist since Charlton Heston finally realised he was home in the  personal classic, The Planet of the Apes (1968).

Lord Summerisle: Welcome, fool. You have come of your own free will to the appointed place. The game is over.
Sergeant Howie: Game? What game?
Lord Summerisle: The game of the hunted leading the hunter. You came here to find Rowan Morrison, but it is we who have found you and brought you here and controlled your every thought and action since you arrived. Principally, we persuaded you to think that Rowan Morrison was being held as a sacrifice because our crops failed last year.
Sergeant Howie: I know your crops failed. I saw the harvest photograph.
Lord Summerisle: Oh, yes. They failed, all right. Disastrously so. For the first time since my grandfather came here. The blossom came, but the fruit withered and died on the bough. That must not happen again this year. It is our most earnest belief that the best way of preventing this is to offer to our God of the Sun and to the Goddess of our Orchards the most acceptable sacrifice that lies in our power. Animals are fine, but their acceptability is limited. A little child is even better, but not nearly as effective as the right kind of adult.

Unfortunately, Sgt. Howie is the right kind of adult. Cops for crops. Like the beetle under Rowan's school desk, there's nowhere left to go for our protagonist. It's over. And to think, if he wasn't faithful to his fiancée on the mainland (nowhere near a stunner, in my opinion) and succumbed to his lustful temptation like every other man, the night before, when Willow was writhing naked and gagging for it, he would have ruined their whole May Day plan while getting his end away. That's what you get for still being a virgin so late, I suppose.

Willow MacGregor: A man who would come here of his own free will.
The Librarian: A man who has come here with the power of a king by representing the law.
Willow MacGregor: A man who would come here as a virgin.
The Librarian: A man who has come here as a fool 

Despite Sgt. Howie imminently becoming barbecued pork, what I love about the last few minutes of the film, is how he sows the seed of doubt upon Lord Summerisle and the islanders. Should the crops fail once again, regardless of the copper being a cropper, then Lord Summerisle would ultimately be next year's big sacrifice. The face of the lord looking shaken, says it all. Hence, despite how downbeat the ending considering the bad guys win in the end, our protagonist may actually have had the last laugh; albeit, in post-film ambiguity.

Back to The Wicker Man's iconic ending. Sgt. Howie is carried to the gigantic wicker effigy where he's caged inside with various beasts. For the record, the goat above Edward Woodward, called Touchwood, got a bit scared and pissed all over the actor. As the giant wicker man is set ablaze, the disturbing sounds of the livestock in peril and understandable distress is heard whilst the islanders gleefully sing the oldest English song know, Sumer Is Icumen In (which was also incorporated in The Mending Song from the children's television show Bagpuss (1974) if you didn't know). For your humble host, the chilling finale of Sgt. Howie's desperate prayers turning into his death screams, whilst Lord Summerisle and his fellow resident sing with delight, would be one of the best examples of daylight horror done right. Cut! Print! Classic!

Sadly, The Wicker Man had serious post-production woes; notably, its studio, British Lion Films, undergoing new management at the time. This resulted in Peter Snell being given the heave-ho, probably because of his involvement with Ingrid Pitt, and the state of the finished product being in jeopardy. According to Christopher Lee, the newly appointed managing director, Michael Deeley, absolutely hated The Wicker Man; going as far as describing it as one of the worst films he had ever watched. It would also end up being butchered in the editing suite, supposedly to make it more marketable. The new heads at British Lion were absolutely clueless about the future classics they had that year. Little did they know that both The Wicker Man and Don't Look Now (1973) would be revered years later. Instead, they were screened as a double bill the year of their release.

The Wicker Man did of course become a cult film later, of course. Thanks to Roger Corman having a longer print of the film, some scenes were salvaged. What wasn't, was bizarrely buried beneath an English motorway. The Wicker Man would be the debut feature presentation on the legendary film show, Moviedrome (1988-2000) and would attract a new generation of fans. Today. we know it as one of the greatest horror films ever. Its influence in the genre can be seen far and wide with other notable folk horror films such as Ari Aster's Midsommer (2018), and what I consider the best horror film of the 2010s and a trendsetter in its own right, Robert Eggers's The Witch (2015). The more recent  When Evil Lurks (2023) also proves folk horror can still be a provocative subgenre in horror even now. The Wicker Man was also given the horrible remake treatment, which is only really memorable for Nicolas Cage's O.T.T performance, whilst Hardy would knock out the ill conceived sequel The Wicker Tree (2011) — makes absolutely no sense having Lord Summerisle in it. The original will always be unsurpassed. The ultimate stranger-in-a-strange-land film.

One of the greatest horror films of all time.